Robert's Mirror, Chapter 18, by J.M. Stevenson www.jeannesbottle.com

My surroundings granulized into view one speck of matter at a time. It was as if I were the center of a plate, the middle materializing towards the outer edge. In a blink I was a mirror again.

Sometimes the plight of wish giving was not what it was cracked up to be. There were needy people everywhere. It reminded me of walking along a populated street lined with desperate beggars, hundreds of arms extended, tearing at my clothes as I passed. Everyone had problems and to each individual it appeared to be urgent. People seemed to desire the easy way out, always accepting a single wish, a rescue.

I assumed my poor attitude was an indication of a desperate need for a long rest. It seemed as if I hadn't been on a holiday in some time. In fact, I had no recollection of when my last vacation was spent relaxing on the beach reminiscing life and adventure.

Since I was in such a state, I was numb to the fact that I was an oval shape hanging amongst a gaudy collection of oversized ribbons. The interior wall was long, the main support within a ranch style home. I was positioned in a way that I could gaze about the large family room. On the wall opposite of my hanging, I could see outdoors. A vast lawn with mature soft maple trees and a farm field directly across a county road hinted to the fact that I was no where near a city.

I could hear movement and I somersaulted then twisted around to view my surroundings. A woman stood at a counter in an open concept kitchen. A book was positioned supine and she slid her index finger among the page. The woman was in her later thirties with nothing remarkable about her appearance except her auburn hair that was shimmering from the spotlight above. Auburn almost appeared angelic in the way her hair was highlighted.

"Two eggs." She managed with a sigh.

She shuffled out of view as shifts of movement became discernible. A door closed sounding as if connectors were met with a suctioned type of force. I was reminded of my human life when residing with the Winslow's in England. There was nothing like the three taps of a cracking eggshell resounding throughout the first floor of the estate. That meant one thing, and one thing only....something delicious was about to be prepared. Ah, the simple enjoyment of being human. Cakes, cookies, breads.....oh to have a stomach once again!

After vigorous mixing, the oven door creaked open then slammed echoing the metal racks from within. I gazed about as a lonely silence loomed throughout the house. Seconds then minutes passed.

Once the buzzer clanged, footsteps approached. Auburn pulled the muffins from the oven and placed them on the countertop. A subtle mist rose from the muffin cups in the form of steam.

Auburn then sauntered into the family room, straightening magazines that were lining the coffee table. The woman moved with efficiency. The only pause in her organizational objective was the occasional glimpse at her wrist watch.

After a huge yellow bus rolled into view, I could hear children's voices outdoors, shrill bursts of laughter soon approached. In a flash, the racket followed the children indoors. Book bags, jackets, lunch boxes all became strewn throughout the room. It was as if someone erased Auburn's entire afternoon of straightening up.

"How was your day?" The woman asked the kids.

The boy who I guessed was in the first or second grade answered in a sudden excitement. "The kid that sits next to me, Paul.. got an eraser stuck up his nose! The teacher sent him down to the office and the nurse sent him home early. You should've seen it mom, he wedged it up there claiming he could fire it like a bullet....as if his nose were a gun! It was fun-n-y. I bet he feels like a real dope now."

"Sometimes you kids..." The mother responded with a sigh.

The girl was not much older than the boy, but there was a prissiness about her demeanor. She rolled her eyes at her brother, then collapsed into the chair.

"I've had a hard day mom. We had our field trip to the creek. Everyone else managed to find the all the leaves we were supposed to, but the two boys I was stuck with, decided it would be better to have leaf fights. I need you to write the teacher a note. It isn't my fault, I did my work! I just know I'm going to get a bad mark all because of them!"

"It's okay Sylvia. I'll take care of it later."

"Thanks mom."

"Are you kids hungry?"

"Yes!" They answered in unison.

"I made blueberry muffins this afternoon. Would you care for some?"

"Umm." The boy said.

"That would be great!" The girl replied with an elated tone.

"Brian, you and Sylvia wash your hands." "Any homework?" The mother said lifting the bags from the floor and hanging the jackets on hooks near the door.

"I have to look for pictures of things beginning with the letter W." The boy responded. "...then glue them in my journal."

"I don't have a lot of homework since we had the field trip today."
"Okay." The mother said following them into the kitchen.

It warmed my spirit to see the normalcy of their routine. Everyone seemed comfortable within the household and they all interacted with a sense of appreciation for one another.

Towards evening after Auburn scampered about with incredible stamina. I watched as she assisted Brian with his homework, prepared a balanced meal, and helped Sylvia to braid her hair. A fast rolling blue auto pulled into the yard. Moments later, a man with a protruding beer gut entered the room.

"Hey Thelma how was your day?" He spat in a gruff tone.

"It was okay. I managed to get the bills paid and the groceries bought this morning."

"Did you remember to pick up my suit from the tailor?"

"Yes. It's in the closet."

"Good." He said fingering through the day's mail that was positioned on a square table near the front door.

"I'm really beat." He said sliding to the couch and clicking on the television. The solitude of the home was disrupted with fake laughter from a comedy show playing at incredible volume. The man's eyes glazed over as he somehow disappeared within the happenings of the electronic box.

"Are you hungry Troy?" Auburn directed towards deaf ears.

"TROY?" She said again rushing from the kitchen and pulling the remote into her grip. In an instant she clicked the television off. The man swung his gaze to her and his eyebrows creased with annoyance.

"Hey!" He snapped.

"I asked if you were hungry."

"Oh. I could eat, but I had to stop off with the guys for a few drinks, so I'm not starving or anything."

"I made a roast. Would you help me set the table?" Thelma asked eyeing him with hope.

"Naw. I'm really beat. You should've seen, I was on my feet the entire afternoon. I've got to order some rubber mats for the warehouse especially in the packing area. That concrete, it's a killer on my legs."

"I'm rather tired myself." Thelma said gazing at Troy.

"Yeah as if..." He said with sarcasm.

"What is that supposed to mean exactly?"

"Like you've got it so hard these days...go cry me a river." He said in a mocking way.

"I work hard around here."

"Oh if only I was allowed the luxury of staying at home while you got a job in the real world."

"So what are you saying Troy, my work isn't important just because I am not getting paid to do it?"

Troy fought off an outright grin. "Naw but I bet my last dollar that you can tell me what's happening on most of the afternoon soaps, right?" He began to chuckle with maliciousness.

"You think I have the time to watch television?" She asked with an incredulous tone.

Troy was snickering now, obviously amused at his power to push her buttons and cause her to loose control of her temper.

"No sir! Someone has to do the laundry, buy groceries, prepare dinner and pick up after the slobs in this house."

"Two hours of work tops!" Troy managed with a superior tone.

"Oh how I wish we could trade places for just one day mister! You'd see what it's like to be responsible for you and the kids."

"Oh yeah? You'd get a rude awakening at how difficult it is to manage the warehouse. Not only would you be responsible for keeping the products in stock, you'd have to make sure everyone is doing their jobs of filling orders and shipping them by the two hour deadline."

"I realize you work hard for your money Troy."

"Do you? You certainly spend it without consideration!"

"Let's not fight, not tonight." Thelma said gazing at the kids who were observing with wide eyes.

The remainder of the evening, Troy sat on the sofa alone while the kids disappeared into their rooms. Thelma cleared the table and took care of the dirty dishes. ON several instances, Troy gazed towards Thelma who was cleaning the kitchen, then shrugged his shoulders as if her efforts were not of significance.

The racket from her cleaning seemed to distract him from the noisy television box.

After Thelma made certain the kids had bath's and were in bed, she returned to the family room and took a place on the sofa. By this time, Troy was sound asleep in his reclining chair.

"Troy?" She questioned in a tone above a whisper. Thelma gazed at the television where Monday night football was blaring at an unhealthy volume.

"TROY go to bed."

Troy jolted up nodding in agreement.

"I've had such a long day today." Troy said shuffling away.

When he was out of earshot, Thelma whispered, "the drinks after work didn't help your energy level either I'll bet."

Thelma clicked off the television and gazed at the family photograph on the table next to her. Tears began to stream down her face as her problems weighed heavy.

"If I were a man, I would not treat my wife and family the way you do mister!" She declared.

"I wish I could experience what it is like for just one day. I know I'd be different. I wouldn't take my wife for granted, that's for sure."

"Is that what you wish?" I asked Thelma.

Thelma gazed about with fear. "Whoa." She said in a panic.

"It's okay." I managed in a reassuring tone.

"I hear a voice. Where are you?" Thelma questioned.

"Over here, the mirror."

"What is this Snow White?" Thelma asked with sarcasm.

"Heaven's no. I'm here to grant you a single wish and in this case perhaps the experience of being a man for a day?"

"I don't know." Thelma said with apprehension. "I was just releasing some steam, really."

"No? Maybe it would be a good idea." I encouraged.

"Who would take care of my family?" Thelma asked.

"We could switch you with your husband." I offered.

"That wouldn't be fair. I think I'd be extra hard on him, you know, punish him for his horrible comments earlier."

"Okay, well who then?"

"We're pretty good friends with the Anderson's down the street. Maybe I could switch with Carl. Besides, he works with Troy at VDI Distributing. I'd get a new perspective maybe on what my husband does exactly during a typical workday. I know Carl would be reliable for taking care of the kids in my place."

"Okay. I don't see a problem with that." I said.

Thelma began to chuckle in anticipation.

"Well?" She asked.

"Okay, here it goes." I said.

Within a swirling stream of vapor, I rose up from the mirror and hovered above Thelma. Extending my hands I removed every smidgen of spirit from her body. We meshed as Thelma and I became one essence.

"This is wild!" Her voice admitted as we took flight from the family room and through the large window.

I read her thoughts as we floated at a relaxed pace in the autumn breeze. In an instant we arrived to a home similar to those surrounding it. "This is it." I heard her say. There was a television playing in the front room. A man and woman were watching the evening news. The woman who Thelma identified as Agnes, was doing needlepoint. Precise fingers looped the thread through the canvas material. A remarkable frog was taking form with several varying colors adding shade and depth to the image.

Our spirits hovered above Carl and I extended my hand, lifting the invisible from within his masculine encasement. I then proceeded to hurl him into the direction of Thelma's home.

Thelma and I gazed with interest as Carl's eyes snapped closed and his body twitched from his shoulders down to his legs. Agnes did not gaze up from her needlepoint as we took flight once again, nudging Carl's spirit through the wall and down the street.

"What is going on here?" He mumbled with anxiety.

"I need a favor." Thelma explained. "Just for a day."

"This is the strangest dream that I've ever had."

"Listen to me Carl. I want to take your place for a little while. I need you to take care of Troy and the kids for me. Just pretend you're me and tend to the house, okay?"

"Whatever." He whispered, overwhelmed with the experience of floating.

We suddenly found ourselves back in Thelma's family room. We then proceeded to shove Carl's spirit into Thelma's resting body.

In an instant he opened Thelma's eyes. I could sense the spirit of Thelma feeling amazement at watching herself stand and rush to the mirror. Carl gazed at Thelma's face, seeing himself for the first time within a woman's encasement.

"I really need to stop drinking." He announced shaking his head with disbelief.

"Carl... please take care of my family." Thelma urged as we floated towards the window.

"...and don't forget to run the treadmill tomorrow after the kids go to school. Thirty minutes at 5 mph., trust me your body will feel energized."

With that, we had flown off at an accelerated speed. With the sound of a pop we entered Carl.

"This is strange." Thelma said forcing Carl's eyelids open.

Agnes gazed over then grinned at Carl with enormous love. "Why don't you turn in for the night?"

I found myself nodding all under the control of Thelma. I decided to let go of myself completely, succumbing to the rest that I so desperately needed. Once we turned into bed, I fell asleep closing myself off from the project at hand. I therefore turned on a mental timer set to awaken in approximately twenty four hours, the following evening. "Let the chips fall where they may." I whispered to Thelma as my lights went out and the view of her life as Carl disappeared.

_____________

(From the perspective of Thelma Burnett)

I found myself snoring, something that I normally didn't do. It was strange, inhabiting the male body. Although I was in a home that I had visited quite often, everything about my surroundings seemed foreign. I twisted, then turned within the bed uncomfortable. My knees ached with pain. I sat upright as Agnes entered the room clicking on the closet light. She began to disrobe and I averted my gaze, not caring to view my best friend unclothed.

"Carl, do you think I've put on a few pounds here?" Agnes said patting her gut.

"No honey." I said with a whine trying to imitate the speech of Carl trying to appease her.

"I feel so fat lately, ya know? Thelma tells me I should exercise everyday. I don't have the energy, I mean, it's heck keeping up on the household stuff plus holding down my weekend job at the video store."

"You'd probably have more energy if you did exercise ya know?"

"So you admit it, I am putting on some weight."

"I didn't say that!" I snapped feeling a surge of annoyance.

"I have my twenty year reunion coming up next summer and I suppose I've been feeling a bit self conscious about it."

"You look great, honestly Agnes." I said.

Agnes threw on her flannel nightgown then dove into bed. She pulled the covers back and nestled herself in. It was then the situation dawned on me. Oh, how awkward.... I was suddenly a married man.

"I think I'll try the couch tonight." I said rising up from the bed.

"What's the matter?" Agnes questioned with concern in her voice.

"I was on my legs so much this afternoon, they ache something terrible." I said using my husband's line from earlier.

"You want me to rub them down with wintergreen oil?"

"No thank you Agnes." I said shuffling away. "That stuff smells rank.. besides, it reminds me of old people."

I paused for a moment at the doorway.

"Carl?" She asked.

I pivoted around.

"Come back here honey....let me massage your calves, it'll help."

"No thanks. I...I think I'll take some aspirin. That should do the trick."

In an instant I plopped onto their hard sofa. I had just began to dose when gentle fingers began to kneed my tired legs.

"This isn't so bad now is it Carl?" Agnes questioned.

"Look Aggie, I've had a rough afternoon and want nothing more than to be left alone." I said swinging up and pulling her hand from my leg.

Even in the dimness of light I could sense the sadness in my friend's expression. I had hurt her feelings, hurt her feelings the way my husband had hurt mine on various occasions of similar circumstance.

Agnes slowly stood. "I was just trying to make you feel better, that's all. I know how hard you work for the family."

"Look Aggie, I'm sorry. I'm really not in the mood to be pampered tonight. In fact, why don't we play some cards or something?"

"Play some cards?" Agnes said with shock. "You want to play some cards at ten thirty at night?"

"Yes. How about a game of UNO?"

"Carl Anderson, have you gone completely insane?"

"No. I was just thinking it would be fun is all.... something out of the ordinary."

"I just played UNO with Thelma the other day. She creamed me too!"

"See, maybe you could use some practice." I argued.

"Not this late at night, I've had a rough day myself."

"Well okay then."

"I can't let you sleep on the sofa Carl. I'm concerned that your back will seize up lifting at work tomorrow."

"Well I'll come to bed then, just don't hog all of the covers."

Agnes pulled my hand into hers as we tiptoed in the direction of the bedroom.

Once we nested into the bed, her hand found my arm holding it in a reassuring way. It was odd to have someone care for my well being for a change. As strange as the moment was, the nurturing directed to me was of great comfort. For a few brief moments I felt jealous of the fact that Carl and Agnes had something that my marriage was lacking.

The following morning arrived with an obnoxious bell resounding. Agnes clicked off the alarm then gently tapped my shoulder.

"Carl, come on you need to get into the shower. You'll be late again and Troy will get nasty with you."

"Troy can be such a jerk!" I snapped speaking from experience.

I felt a surge of embarrassment as I disrobed. I had never considered how bizarre it would be to be in Carl's body, it was odd having a different anatomy, a man's anatomy. I did a quick spray of his important parts and took extra time in styling Carl's thinning hair.

A few minutes later, I had changed into a VDI uniform then headed towards the kitchen. Agnes had breakfast set out for me. She had prepared scrambled eggs, whole wheat toast and freshly squeezed orange juice.

"You didn't have to go to so much trouble here. I could've grabbed a bowl of cereal or something."

"Carl, you hate cereal! You've said so a zillion times."

"Here. Why don't you sit down and eat my breakfast. I can make my own this morning." I announced.

Agnes creased her brows in contemplation. "I don't understand what's up with you?"

"Nothing's up. I just thought maybe you'd appreciate a hot meal for a change. You do so much here all the time for me and the kid. Don't you ever get tired of it?"

Agnes sat for a moment, dumbfounded. I knew she was reflecting on her complaints from the previous week on how Carl never did anything for her in return. I think her exact words were "inconsiderate lug-head."

"Go ahead, eat." I said amused by her shock.

Agnes smiled as she placed the fork to her lips.

"Sometimes Carl, you are packed full of surprises."

I then hurried about the kitchen working with proficiency. A few minutes later, I slid my plate onto the table and shook black pepper onto the eggs ever so lightly.

"I didn't realize you knew how to cook." Agnes said gazing at my well presented array of food. Somehow I didn't consider the fact that Carl was inept in the kitchen, but Thelma on the other hand, had taken several cooking classes and at one time had considered a career as a chef.

I shrugged my shoulders discounting her curiosity and began to feast.

Once breakfast was completed, I proceeded to clear the table and load the dishwasher.

"You'd better hurry along Carl, you're going to be late for work." Agnes said grabbing the dishes from my hands.

"okay." I said hurrying towards the door.

"Carl?" Agnes said.

I swung around gazing at the vulnerability of Carl's wife, my best friend.

"Yeah?"

"Don't forget your lunch." She said handing me a black metallic box.

"Thanks dear." I said scampering towards the door.

Agnes hurried to my side and brushed her lips to my cheek.

"Oh geese." I said feeling embarrassed by her show of affection.

I sped away contemplating the entire set up of man-woman relationships. It was odd experiencing things from the male perspective. There was so much to consider. Would I fall into a certain amount of laziness if there was someone willing to do basic tasks for me on a day to day basis? I thought back at how my own mother had waited on everyone hand and foot during my childhood. No, I didn't like it back then and I had to believe that I would not fall into that same mode of dependence, male or not.

________________

VDI Distributing laid tucked among an avenue of commercial warehouses. It was the main supplier to the region for a variety of electronic merchandise. Not only did the company ship and deliver to local merchants, it also had clients in three surrounding states. The biggest seller within the past five years had been the innovation of Sony and the beta video unit. Since this technological copyright was not shared in the industry, VHS standard became the top money maker and popular format.

My stomach turned with nervousness. I knew certain things about VDI from what Troy had shared at the end of a long hard day from venting his stress. I knew the building layout from the occasional lunch dates with my husband, but my biggest worry was the fact that I had no clue as to the specific company procedures of shipping and receiving.

Carl's body although in much better shape than my husband's seemed to be exhausted. Aches and pains radiated from his joints. He was not well and I suspected he was living with a mild case of arthritis.

I parked Carl's Chevy truck in the company lot. My stomach twisted with nervousness as I totted the lunch that Agnes had packed. How wonderful it was to have someone fix a sandwich for me. I wondered if Troy appreciated the lunch I prepared each and every morning for him.

As I exited the truck, I pulled Carl's favorite baseball cap from the seat and slid it on in his favorite manner, the brim to the back.

I tried to walk normal, but for some reason felt self conscious and feminine. As I approached the entrance, several coworkers were standing at the doorway for their first smoke of the day.

"Carl." One of the men blurted as I opened the door.

"Guys." I said not recalling anyone's name in particular. My stomach wrenched in fear. What was I doing, was I completely nuts?

The warehouse at that hour was quiet. Not everyone had arrived to begin the workday. There was a hint of spent fuel in the air and I assumed it was from the forklift that was used to haul huge skids within the merchandise empire.

I grabbed a timecard then placed it beneath the single tooth of the machine. With a tap to the elongated bar, a mechanism bore down leaving the date and time imprinted on the card.

"This is neat." I said tempted to do it again.

I headed to the locker area and scanned the many rows of cubbyholes. Noticing Carl's name, I slid my lunch into the slot and hung my jacket inside. As a final thought, I whipped the baseball cap from my head and it landed on the hook.

"Okay." I said. "Work time."

The aroma of coffee filled the processing area. I gazed at Troy's empty desk surprised that he had not yet arrived. He was very conscientious about being early in order to sift through paperwork and prepare for the day ahead of him.

I began to study the layout to obtain a feel for order protocol. There were various bins for small products and large holding areas for the major electronics. Three 25" televisions were on hold for Blackwell's Department Store. I studied the invoice and two workers had signed off the day prior indicating that the order was filled with the correct merchandise.

The televisions were scheduled for a "will call" (pick up) for sometime that afternoon.

A beep from overhead caused me to jump. I was the solitary person in the back. The receptionist announced "Carl Anderson, line three." I hurried to the wall and pulled the phone clicking the flashing light.

"Yeah." I said in the abrupt tone that was unique to Carl.

"Carl?" Troy's voice shook with emotion from the other end.

"Troy is that you?"

"Yeah you jerk! I just woke up and I'm running way behind. It seems Thelma is having some problems functioning this morning. I don't know what's going on with her. Maybe she's having a breakdown or something. I'll be in, but late. I'm going to help her get the kids ready for school."
"Is everything okay there?" I asked with a mixture of guilt and concern.

"First she forgot to wake me up, then she burned my breakfast....nearly caught the kitchen on fire by leaving the dishtowel too close to the burner."

"You need me to swing by?" I asked forgetting for a moment that I was Carl.

"Swing by here? Why would you do that?" Troy snapped with disbelief.

"I....I um, I meant maybe I should phone Agnes to go over. Maybe she could keep an eye on Thelma today."

"Good idea." Troy managed as I hung up the phone. After several failed attempts at dialing out, I realized the number 9 had to be depressed in order to send an outside call from the warehouse.

A moment later the phone was ringing at the Anderson's home. "Hello." Agnes said in her normal tone.

"Hey, this is Carl. I was wondering if you wouldn't mind peeking in on Thelma. I just spoke with Troy and she's having a crisis."

"A crisis...sure honey, it's no problem. We were supposed to meet this afternoon to do some shopping. I'll just go a little early is all."

"Okay, thanks." I said.

"Oh Carl, since I have you on the phone, don't forget about Mikey's scout meeting this evening. He's looking forward to having you show his friends how to put together flies for fly fishing."

"Flies?" I asked suddenly overcome with worry.

Just then my coworkers entered the processing area. Several men gave me curious looks as my eyes narrowed towards them with fear.

"I've got to go now." I said feeling my pulse race and my mouth turn to chalk.

"Ol' Troy must have had one too many last night." One of the workers commented gazing at the vacant manager's desk. The group of men laughed hysterically.

"Troy is going to be late arriving this morning." I announced.

"Excellent!" A man with his hair pulled back into a ponytail exclaimed. If it wasn't for a mustache beneath his nose, he would have been mistaken for a slender female.

Everyone headed towards the break room and plopped down into chairs. I followed them not knowing what else to do.

"Shouldn't we get to work?" I inquired as everyone gazed at me with disbelief.

"What is the saying?" A man with an unusually round nose answered. "Oh yeah, when the cat's away, the mice will play!"

The room of workers began to cackle.

"I think if we're getting paid, we should be productive." I said trying to motivate the bunch.

"Yeah?" A worker said from the back of the room. "Then why don't ya go to it then?"

I shook my head then hurried from the room. I darted back into the warehouse and a middle aged woman was fingering through the paperwork. She had stringy brown hair that was in serious need of a shampoo geared for oily hair.

"Carl." She said sliding her eyes from the paperwork to me.

"Joyce." I said remembering her name.

"We've got fifteen orders that are due to go out."

"I can't get the guys to move this morning." I said. "Troy is running a bit behind and the crew would rather sip coffee and goof off."

"Nonsense." Joyce said darting to the doorway of the lunch room. She paused there a moment gazing back at me with an expression similar to a soldier about to head into battle.

"You idiots have five seconds to get on your feet and fill these orders. Just because Mr. Burnett is not around, doesn't mean you can slack off. We have Drake appliances headed here for these combo units. I suggest you move if you value your job.... if not, I'm sure we can find workers to replace you. After all this is a sluggish economy!"

In an instant the men materialized through the doorway. Joyce handed a singe invoice to every man that passed. From a rack of clipboards, each man grabbed a board and attached the yellow sheet as they marched along.

"Tattletale." One man grumbled as he passed.

I shrugged my shoulders not knowing what else to do.

From Troy's desk his phone began to ring.

Joyce appeared at my side. "You are the number two man around here...are you going to get the phone or do you need a secretary to do it for you?"

"I'm not up for sarcasm today Joyce." I responded walking to my husband's desk.

"Then do your job." She muttered under her breath.

By the time I reached the phone, it had stopped ringing.

I gazed to Joyce and she smirked.

_______

There were several problems that needed to be fixed by the time Troy was due to arrive. Two of the warehouse ticket fillers was caught hiding out behind a line of video tape boxes playing a game of paper wad into the trash basketball.

Along the furthest row of the warehouse, there was an office chair race of which the entire crew participated placing nickel bets on who would be the winner. Everything was chaos and I had no clue how to snap everyone in line and back to work.

To make matters worse, Abe Ward, one of the owners, sauntered to the back to check the current stock of video tape and was mortified to find the everyone goofing off.

Therefore, I was whisked into an emergency meeting. It was understandable how I was reprimanded for not doing my job as assistant manager and allowing such behavior from the order fillers. In an instant I realized the difficulties Troy faced on a day to day basis. On the other hand, I too had problems, but in different ways.

I was the one to maintain peace within the household. There were occasions that the kids seemed to disagree about everything. In that I understood Troy and I had baby-sitting in common. The only difference was he baby-sat children trapped in adult bodies...children who would obviously never grow up...forever trapped in the mindset of Never, Never land.

Then there was my problem of dealing with Troy. There were points as of recent that he tuned everyone out, turned away from me and my attempts at being supportive. It was as if he didn't need me any longer and yet I was there for him. Sure he'd vent about this and that regarding his work, but there was something more going on, something I couldn't quite put my finger on.

How I missed the old Troy in the days when the kids were little babies. Troy helped me through diaper changes, two a.m. feedings and infant baths. Like turning off a light switch he became a stranger...a person who often sat in his easy chair brooding and depressed.

Then there were his episodes of crankiness and temper outbursts. Through those particular instances it was difficult to love him and somehow I managed to hold on. I took a vow for better or for worse and this was as low as it got for us.

Troy suddenly materialized from behind and placed his hand on my shoulder. I jumped not expecting the very person I was thinking about to jolt me back to reality.

"I just heard about your morning Carl. I thought you learned all about management in that night school class you took at the university. Mr. Ward was not very amused by the circus of clowns playing around back here."

"I'm sorry. My mind has been on other things today. We all have off days, where everything goes amiss, right?"

Troy gazed at me then shook his head.

"You ain't the only one having a day out of sorts. Thelma isn't herself...she's talking crazy. I had to wait for Aggie to get there before I felt secure enough to leave her. It's as if she's forgotten everything. The odd part about it is, she claims to be you!"

I laughed as if the whole thing was ludicrous.

"Claims to be me." I said discounting the statement. "That's a good one."

"I don't know Carl. Maybe she's figured everything out."

"How's that?" I asked pinched by curiosity.

"Well you know..." Troy said through a sheepish grin.

"No I don't!" I snapped.

"Heather." "Do I have to spell everything out for you?" Troy whispered shoving an invoice in my direction to be double checked before shipment.

"Heather?" I questioned feeling a surge of nausea.

"Sometimes Carl, you're such a dimwit." Troy darted away to assist a delivery person that was waiting to pick up a truckload of video players.

"A girlfriend." I whispered to myself. "He has a girlfriend?"

Joyce stepped over and smirked at me for voicing a question that Carl obviously knew the answer to.

"Where have you been Carl? Troy hasn't exactly been discreet, you know?"

"Who is she?" I asked feeling my face flush with anger.

"Your cousin Heather. Remember when you sent him over to her house last Thanksgiving to help hook the new video recorder to her stereo. She stopped in and acted like it was brain surgery or something?"

Joyce gazed at me now with shock. "Come on, I've heard him spilling the dirt about it all along to you. What, are you going senile on us this morning?"

"I just can't believe he'd do that to Thelma is all. She's such a good person."

"Oh, I like Thelma too, but come on, she is a bit of a flake, right? No one in this day and age is a full time housewife anymore. I can understand how he'd get bored with her flavor."

"There's nothing wrong with her flavor!" I snapped my anger taking hold of common sense.

"I suppose not, but we don't have to live in his shoes now do we?"

"You know the thing that bothers me most here..." I said seething with fury. "His wife even mows the lawn! Troy doesn't know how good he has it. In fact, Aggie and I went over one afternoon and she was on a ladder cleaning out the gutters. Do you know where Troy was on this particular Saturday afternoon?"

Joyce shook her head no.

"In front of the television watching the college ball game."

"What can I say?" Joyce said raising her hands for emphasis.

"Does Aggie know?" I wondered out loud.

"I don't know Carl, have you mentioned it to her?"

I shrugged my shoulders wondering if my best friend Aggie shared in this knowledge and didn't bother to enlighten me... if the tables were turned, would I tell her such a thing about Carl?

Suddenly the simple wish given to me, wasn't so simple. "Robert!" I whispered as Joyce darted away. "I've had enough now....Robert?" I soon realized that Robert was out of contact and I was on my own until the evening.

My heart was broken and yet I had to pretend to be Carl, assistant manager of VDI Warehouse, perfect marriage, perfect father.

At ten minutes until lunch break an older woman with a painted face and a short skirt sauntered in the warehouse through the back door. Troy appeared elated by her presence. As she strolled in closer, there was something about her appearance that led me to believe her life had been hard. Wrinkles lined her mouth and no matter how much base makeup she wore, patches of inconsistent skin was apparent. There was nothing beautiful about the woman aside from her bleached blond hair.

"Hi cousin!" The woman said grinning in my direction. I gave her a nasty look then continued to heave a mini refrigerator onto the shipping table. Her heels clicked as she strutted across the concrete floor to Troy's desk. She leaned onto the corner very close to him and I felt a sudden urge to claw her eyes out.

"Trollop." I whispered to myself.

"I'm going to lunch." Troy yelled above the noise from the distant forklift.

"I'll bet you are!" Round nose commented from behind a stack of recycling boxes near me.

"I'm not feeling so well." I said hurrying to Troy as he attempted to steal away with the home wrecker.

"You can't leave now!" Troy said guiding the woman outdoors then closing the door so that we could discuss this in private.

"I don't believe I have much of a choice. I've all ready puked up my breakfast. I'm afraid I'm spreading germs around here. Mr. Ward wouldn't like it if the entire bunch called in sick from the flu, it would close this entire warehouse down."

"Darn it Carl!"

"Big plans today?" I asked through clenched teeth.

Troy grinned as if he had won the lottery. "Well, you know..." He said chuckling with embarrassment.

Heather opened the door. "Hey doll are ya coming?" She asked with a cigarette dangling from her lips.

"One minute babe. Carl's feeling rather ill."

"Ah poor thing!" Heather said lacking sincerity.

"What do you see in her?" I asked after the door swung closed once again.

"I don't know." He responded shrugging his shoulders.

"I'm surprised at you for doing that to Thelma." I snapped.

"Hey, leave her out of this. This has nothing to do with her."

"This has everything to do with her." I hissed.

"You were the one who introduced us. Why the change of heart now all of a sudden?" Troy asked.

"It's not right. You have kids for Pete's sake!"

"If no one ever finds out, what's the difference?" Troy argued. "It isn't as if Heather is expecting a committment or anything. If you want the truth, I haven't felt this young in a long time! Having all this garbage to carry around hasn't been simple. House payments, car payments, credit card debt, resurfacing the driveway, keeping everything going at home, motivating those idiots around here... I wanted an escape, heck don't you think I deserve a bit of an escape?"

"So take a vacation, besides, what about Thelma?" I asked fighting off tears and my voice cracking with feminine emotion.

"I'm not leaving Thelma. Like I said before, this has nothing to do with her nor the kids."

"You promised to be faithful, wasn't that in your vows?" I asked as my mind sped off in several pain filled directions.

"This is getting too weird, even for you my friend!" Troy said opening the door to outside.

"Go on home, get some rest." Troy muttered and then he was gone.

_______

I didn't drive to Carl's home, I pointed the pickup truck to the horizon and rolled along. Tears began to well up until I couldn't fight it any longer. I began to cry. It was odd crying within Carl's outer encasement. I felt as if I were on a seesaw... testosterone fed anger on one end, feminine emotion on the other.

"Robert?" I called trying to entice the wish man forward. "Mr. Robert, I'm not liking my wish...please let me return to my life as before and erase everything in between. Robert? Hello! Can you hear me?"

Giving up on that notion, I swung the truck around and headed back to town. Dried corn stalks passed in straight rows soothing me as I passed.

I drove home, to my home. Aggie's tattered Volkswagen was parked in the front driveway. Not thinking about who I was, I entered through the front door without knocking.

Aggie gazed up, from the magazine she was paging through, a look of shock overshadowed her face.

"Carl? What are you doing here?" She asked slapping me back to the reality of the unbelievable situation.

"I took the afternoon off. How's Thelma doing?"

Agnes shifted her gaze. "I gave her some of my sleeping pills. I realize I shouldn't have done it, but she was talking crazy! She claimed to really be you darling...the thing of it is, she knew things...oh, I don't know...she was remarkably convincing."

"Do you think she knows?" I asked curious about the truth.

"Knows what?" Agnes responded.

I gazed about feeling my nerves twisting in my stomach. I took a seat directly across from her so that I could study her eyes.

"Heather." I whispered.

Agnes averted her gaze then focused on her hands as she twisted them.

"I certainly hope not, but that is a possibility now isn't it?"
"So you knew about Troy and my cousin Heather?"

"Well yeah." She said with annoyance in her tone.

"We ran into them after Christmas last year. Remember Thelma took the kids to visit with her mother over Christmas vacation?"

"That's right." I said slapped from the inside.

"Troy wasn't exactly discreet when his family was out of town."

I sat pensive as all of the facts fell into place.

"I was such an idiot." I whispered.

"What are you talking about Carl?" Agnes said sliding from the chair and grabbing my hand.

"It's Thelma."

"Thelma, what about her?" Agnes said.

"You don't understand Aggie."

"You're right, I don't. Suppose you explain."

"I'm Thelma."

Agnes rolled her eyes then burst out into laughter. "Carl Anderson you have lost your marbles!"

"I'm serious. I'm Thelma Louise Palmer Burnett. My birthday is February 2^nd. I run the treadmill everyday for approximately 30 minutes. You and I talk on the phone every afternoon during Days of Our Lives if we can't watch the soap together. You adore the character of Roman Brady and I think the character of Marlena is a goody-two shoes."

Agnes began to pale as I continued. "Who told you we were Day's addicts?"

I shook my head dismissing her question.

"I believe I confided in you last week that Troy had been a real grump over the weekend and you said you thought he was just under enormous stress at work.....My favorite color is burgundy and I'd like to redecorate the bathroom in a soft gray and use burgundy accessories."

Agnes gazed towards the bedroom and she shook her head in disbelief.

"What is this, some sort of got-ya television show?"

"No. I'm being totally honest here. I'm Thelma, Thelma Burnett. I borrowed Carl's body last evening because Troy was giving me lip about men having it so much harder than women."

"Well." Agnes said as if wanting to believe, but holding out for a better explanation.

"Aside from learning what a snake Troy really is, I think they have nothing on what we have to put up with!"

"You mean to tell me that nonsense Thelma's been claiming is the absolute truth?"

"Yes."

"Oh come on Carl, what you're saying is impossible." Agnes declared.

"There was a man, a man in the mirror right up there." I said pointing to the oval above her head. "He offered me a single wish... he tried to persuade me to trade with Troy so that I would know first hand about how difficult his workday truly is and he would be privy to mine."

"So how did you get into Carl's body then?" Agnes whispered.

"I thought I'd be too hard on him if he walked a day in my shoes. What I wanted to know was how I would react to having someone do for me like I've been doing for Troy all this time."

Agnes shook her head. "..and?" She questioned.

"Well I made my own breakfast this morning, but I'll be honest with you, it was such a luxury when you handed me that lunch box all ready to go!"

"I'm still not certain I'm getting this here! I'm married to Carl, right? I wouldn't feel at all comfortable with things as they stand at the moment."

I managed a quick chuckle. "This evening we're scheduled to switch back and everything is supposed to return to the way it was, except, I'm uncertain things will ever be the same again. I was slapped with the reality of another woman in Troy's heart, another woman named Heather."

"I don't know whether to hug you or take a switch to you for doing this! Why did you choose Carl of all people?" She asked gazing at me with horror.

"Because you're the couple that Troy and I are closest to. Besides I figured I could see Troy at work through Carl's perspective except now I realize I was better off not being enlightened to the truth of his typical workday."

"Are you angry with me for not telling you about...?"
"The hussy?"

I shook my head no.

"It's a tough situation to be in, that's for sure. I don't blame you, it wasn't your place to tell me about my marital blindness."

"Now what?" Agnes wondered.

"Now there's the question of the day."